08 setembro 2020

O testemunho do Angel No. 3 ( Boutique da Cultura)


Well, after 1 year, my project has come into an end, and it has had a lot of experiences and feelings. The first day after my project finished was kind of magic. I felt the same strange sensation that I had when I was here for my first time, and I for me this kind of things are special. For me, feelings and sensations are attached to specific moments, because this feelings are born from experiences thay you had, thoughts, and just in that specific moment. Everytime you feel something, you feel it for the first time, because maybe you have felt something similar, but in another conditions, so it's kind of different. That's why for me it was strange, because I had the same feeling of being starting a new chapter, in the same place after one year. It's not the same, but I feel it like.

In this time, I have also learnt a lot from my relations with the people, more than what people think. I've discovered from close persons a lot of things, like their way to act depending on the situation, depending with who they are, and that has surprised me with a lot of people. I've met people who has been kind of egocentric, who wants to be the center of the attention, people who interrupts (in a bad way) other people when the other is talking. People who is really false (...). Anyway, not all the people is bad, or has bad things. Not all the volunteers that I have met that have wanted to be the "star" are bad person, some of them they have a really big heart when they don't look to themselves, and that's something that I really appreciate, how a person can change that much depending on "where is she/he looking", it's something from where I have learnt a lot, it's really interesting how people minds can work. People diversity is always good and I like that people find themselves different from others, or they just have more ego, the only thing I think about it is that they should be careful, when your ego is bigger than your person, you're no one, they are just a mouth talking about themselves or trying to be funny, and before being popular or funny, I prefer to be myself, to be the person I am. It's about listening and talking, when you do one of them more than the other, you're trying to be more than you are.

I have also met incredible people this lasts months. It's true that I have lost a little bit of contact with some friends because since the summer came, I don't really want to be talking that much via phone or whatever, I'm more like the wind that blows the leaf and carry it whenever it feels. It hasn't been anything particular to anyone, it has been just my way to feel the life as we should, do things just by how you feel them, and with this I don't want to say that I didn't want to talk or meet people, I just want to say that I preferred to let the things be by their way to be rather than force anything or being taking the phone to talk, I'm a person who likes to talk face to face. Anyway, this last months I've met a lot of incredible people, more outside than inside of the volunteer circle, and it's a really huge difference for me.

Being volunteer it's hard on meeting people, and it's something that a lot of people could be like "whatt", and I mean, you can meet a lot of people, but it's a lot of people that will go back to another country after some months or 1 year, after they will start their lifes again, and they will start to lose every remember or experience. Maybe it's not like this in all cases, but in most, and we have to be realist, if you leave and people is not keeping the contact with you, in many cases they will forget about others little by little. That's why I have had friends here, and I don't want to impress anyone, just show them the way I am, the way I look, and I think that's magic. I found a group of friends who are aiming for the same as me for the next year and for me it's fantastic, because in this way I can really approach them more to the concept I have of friend, we can live new experiences but not from zero, what makes the relation that we have even stronger. With other people, I'm sure I'm not forgetting them because I have good memory and I've learnt a lot from everyone and even if I don't say it directly, I'm always gratefully by the people I've met for that. About what people thinks about me, I don't really mind, if people want to think I'm "X" or I'm "Z", for me it's the same, for me the most important thing is that who met me, knows me the way I am, I feel and I think, I'll always try to be humble and help the others, I don't feel I need to be talking about myself, and the impact that it has on my friends it's special, because I can be the way I want without caring about almost anything, and they will be the same way, or feel confident with me, adn that's what makes me be the way I am, I don't need to make jokes to make other think I'm funny, or try to be serious to look like that. I'm the way I am thanks to the people I love. Thanks Lisbon for this year, and let's see how comes this next one.



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